Come On

rubber ducky talked to his rubber ducky at 6:12 AM

Monday, December 27, 2004

In my hands
A legacy of memories
I can hear you say my name
I can almost see your smile
Feel the warmth of your embrace
But there is nothing but silence now
Around the one I loved
Is this our farewell?

Sweet darling you worry too much, my child
See the sadness in your eyes
You are not alone in life
Although you might think that you are

Never thought
This day would come so soon
We had no time to say goodbye
How can the world just carry on?
I feel so lost when you are not by my side
But there's nothing but silence now
Around the one I loved
Is this our farewell?

So sorry your world is tumbling down
I will watch you through these nights
Rest your head and go to sleep
Because my child,
this is not our farewell
This is not our farewell

rubber ducky talked to his rubber ducky at 11:18 PM

Friday, December 24, 2004

Where are you Christmas?
Why can't I find you?
Why have you gone away?

My world is changing
I'm rearranging
Does that mean Christmas changes too?

Where are you Christmas?
Do you remember...
The one you used to know...

Me when I were so carefree
Now nothing's easy
Did Christmas change...
Or just...
Me......?

rubber ducky talked to his rubber ducky at 6:56 AM

I don't know when we fell apart
The love that we had was like a work of art
I used to see Heaven in your eyes
Now angels are fallen from your skies
Things we said were so wrong
And I haven't held you for so long
My foolish pride turns me inside
Why did we tell all those lies?
You can reach for the phone
You don't have to be alone

Outside the winter seems so cold
Your heart is frozen like the snow
And there's no one home to keep you safe and warm
Your eyes are red because you've cried
You fell asleep by the fire side
But there's one thing you should know
On this Christmas baby
You don't have to be alone

And I have only one wish on my list, oh
For me you would be the perfect gift, oh yea
There's nothing colder than an empty home, no
And holidays were never meant to be alone, oh
The smiles we gave when our hearts were saved
By each other's love and warmth
That's subsided now
No happiness around
If I could only find a way to your heart

Outside the winter seems so cold
Your heart is frozen like the snow
And there's no one home to keep you safe and warm
You don't have to be alone
Your eyes are red because you've cried
You fell asleep by the fire side
But there's one thing you should know
On this Christmas baby
You don't have to be alone

rubber ducky talked to his rubber ducky at 6:35 AM

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

heya rubber ducky!
just thought you might be bored waiting for me to talk to you. haha.
oh well, one year's passing so quickly.
next year... hmmm... not sure what might happen, hope 2005 will be a better year, for me, for everyone else.

Not really sure what to say right now. Sigh work tomorrow. Sucks. Actually, if someone was working with me, that wouldn't be so bad after all. JY!!! Go work leh!!! Don't whole day play DOTA!!! You noob!!! Hahaha!!

Just got this friendship band as a christmas present. Liked it really much.

My wishlist for christmas:
- be myself
- love God even more
- nothing really much else i want, i am contented =)

A big "thank you" to those who have helped me this year.

and thank you God..

rubber ducky talked to his rubber ducky at 8:05 AM

Saturday, December 18, 2004

I dream a dream as time gone by,
when hopes were high and life worth living.
I dream that love would never die,
I dream that God would be forgiving.

Then I was young and unafraid,
and dreams were made and used and wasted.
There was no ransom to be paid,
no song unsung no wine untasted.

I had a dream my life would be,
so different from this way I'm living,
so different from all it seems,
Now life has lost the dream I dream...

Hey rubber ducky, there's something i want to tell you... I'm alone. Just realised that I can never trust anyone. No one at all, no one except God. Maybe it's my fault. Maybe I'm just too sensitive. But I can't trust anyone now. Yea, guess it's my fault. I don't want to accept, but somehow, I always get this feeling that the things around me seem so...unreal. People aren't real anymore. The crowd is but a facade, ready to change at the turn of a page. Nothing seems real anymore. I feel alone. What should I do? Yea I know, I've always got you. But you can't do anything, you can't speak. But isn't that better? At least I trust you. At least I have you, and God. Guess I'm not that alone after all. But this journey still seems so quiet. Too quiet...

It would be nice to have someone walking beside me...

To God above, I want to walk by you again, to stand tall and unafraid with you, to bravely face the cold world together with you.

Father, I ask only of one thing this Christmas, my innocence. Guide me back to the way I was, bring me back to where I belong, take me back into your arms, fill me with your love, never let me leave your side, for now, for ever.

Journey of a dream, God. There was once, when I was young, I held your hands, I felt them, strong, firm, kind. Back then, they told me, our dream is to be like you, to be God-like. For me, to be with you all the time, was my dream. To walk beside you, knowing that nothing can harm me, was my dream. After, came this point of time, when i lost this dream. It lingered on. I soon grew reluctant to find this dream again. I thought I'd lost it forever. I thought I could never realise it again. Then, right now, in the most unexpected time, when I felt most helpless and afraid and confused, there it was. My dream. Sitting there, right in front of me, all the time. I just never bothered to search. Right now, I've found this dream, a light shines from it once again.

Father, guide me, with your strength, with your light, with your faith, make me what you want me to be. Make me whole again.

rubber ducky talked to his rubber ducky at 3:00 AM

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Finally, my first proper entry. But yeah, those previous ones, somehow I posted them when i felt like what they were portraying. Been raining heavily these past few days. So wet, so cold. Went to work three times a week. From seven in the morning till three in the afternoon. Seven in the morning, three in the afternoon... The same things, the same feeling, first few times were quite alright. But soon after... emptiness. So lonely. So cold. No one with me. Going all the way to work felt so..routine. It was killing me. I don't know, somehow everything feels so cold. No one to comfort me, no one to hold me. Just like that. I'm fading away. How could this happen to me?

rubber ducky talked to his rubber ducky at 2:06 AM

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

I open my eyes
I try to see
but I'm blinded by the white light

I can't remember how
I can't remember why
I'm lying here tonight

And I can't stand the pain
And I can't make it go away
No I can't stand the pain

How could this happen to me
I made my mistakes
I've got no where to run
The night goes on

As I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

Everybody's screaming
I try to make a sound
but no one hears me

I'm slipping off the edge
I’m hanging by a thread
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a
time when nothing mattered
And I can't explain what happened
And I can't erase the things that I've done
No I can't

How could this happen to me
I made my mistakes
I've got no where to run
The night goes on

As I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

I made my mistakes
I've got no where to run
The night goes on

As I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

rubber ducky talked to his rubber ducky at 9:37 AM